Archive for Psychology

Biological Humility

Posted in Life, Present with tags , , , , , , , on July 15, 2011 by Shea Atkin

Asking the body questions that that mind doesn’t want to answer is a scary thing to do.  However, this approach is most effective in matters of getting out of our head. 

I overthink everything.  If my mind isn’t active, I feel like I am being lazy.   I’m starting to learn that this couldn’t be farther from the truth.  As I walk down the path of paying attention to what my body is saying, I realize how often my mind ran the show.   My body didn’t receive any attention for years–mostly because my mind was punishing it .  Now I am able to allow whatever the physiological process is of the day to continue, with no judgement. 

Continuing down this path, I can’t help but acknowledge how easy it is to slip back into old patterns.  The resiliency of the ego is relentless.  Once I am able to strip away pride associated with the feelings of inadequacy, freedom enters and peace is  found. 

I keep going back to the same statement as a reminder:  The body remembers what the mind forgets.  As we continue this journey of acknowledging the somatic connection, a new sense of wholeness is established.  Even though a lot of times biology makes no sense intellectually, it is crucial to our recovery. 

In conclusion, we are, in the present, exactly where we need to be.  It is, what it is.  And that is all I know, biologically speaking.

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Holding Space

Posted in Life, Present with tags , , , , , , , , , on June 15, 2011 by Shea Atkin

Corporately we are wired for community.  As we walk through hell, the tendency to dissociate is high.  Most of us don’t want advice.  We want someone to be present in our grief.  To validate what we are going through.  We are hard-wired for connection, but when something traumatic happens, our intellect (and culture) tells us to stuff it and not deal with the pain.  Biologically speaking–if we are able to discharge the nervous system–the symptoms lose power.  We won’t be “stuck”.  The Animal Kingdom is a prime example.  They don’t have the cultural stigma attached to processing pain.  They just discharge instinctually.

As our anxiety increases, our functioning goes down.  Thus, affecting everyone as a whole.  It’s not just the individual that suffers, it’s everyone around the individual.  We are all connected.  If we could just allow the Reptilian (Instinctual) side of the brain do it’s job–a new sense of freedom will inevitably occur.  We will have the freedom to just “be”.  Along with freedom comes a price–the dropping of symptoms.  Some of us like to hold onto our old patterns, because we wear them as  a label–because it is comfortable.  The cost of freedom, is freedom itself.

Willingness is the key to any kind of change.  Until this occurs internally, transformation cannot occur.  With no judgement, and no expectation–we can “be” present with an individual and allow them the space to heal safely.  To give a voice to the silenced and alone–and to walk through this world, together as one.

Trauma Touch Therapy™

Posted in Life, Past, Present with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 10, 2011 by Shea Atkin

DEFINITION:

Trauma Touch Therapy™ is an advanced therapeutic certification program for those already proficient in bodywork.  The program consists of 100 hours of training: Level I, 50 hours in integrative techniques and fundamentals, a Level II 50 hour Externship.  Many TTT™ students enroll in this training to come to a sense of completion with their own healing process; thus recycling their trauma, turning the disadvantage of their pasts into something of value.  TTT™ training is an intense healing process in itself, requiring students to deepen, within themselves, their sense of authenticity and integrity.

Trauma Touch Therapy™ is a bodywork modality designed to meet the needs of clients with trauma or abuse histories.  This innovative work enables the client to discover the gift within the wound.  Trauma Touch Therapists™ encourage client empowerment and choice, which aids the client in accessing their somatic issues in a safe, nuturing environment.  The work is done on a very individual basis and almost always interfaces with the psychotherapeutic process.  Client traumas include: physical abuse, mental/emotional abuse, sexual abuse, holocaust/post-war traumas, environmental traumas, surgery trauma, PTSD, auto accidents, physical injury and childhood traumas.

This program is approved and regulated by the Colorado School of Higher Education, Division of Private Occupational Schools.  Trauma Touch Therapy™ is owned and operated by the Colorado School of Healing Arts. Trauma Touch Therapy™ was developed under the direction of Chris Smith and is offered solely by the school.  All rights reserved.

Fairytale?

Posted in Life, Past, Present with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 18, 2011 by Shea Atkin

I participated in a yoga workshop with my dear friend a few months ago.  We started out with yoga, followed by a guided meditation and ended with a journal entry focused on a certain thought.  Below, I will write the thought and my journal entry about the thought:

*Don’t believe the fairytale you have created through your body.*

At a loss for word is not usually where I find myself.  This can be taken in many different ways.  Right now, my fairytale is just that–a fairytale.  Unattainable, ficticious, Pollyanna bullshit.  I never try because I don’t really believe that it is possible.  That I don’t really deserve the fairytale…I’m not good enough to wear the pretty dress and win the heart of the adoring prince.  I’m the cinderella in this distance, just dreaming–but not accepting the fairytale as potential reality.  Left with scars and memories–a window to watch the world live as I stay confined in my own little prison that I made with my own hands.  Waiting for the key to unlock and be set free, but it is already in my hand. All that needs to happen is making the decision of freedom or slavery.  No one can choose it but me.

I wear the rags as a constant reminder of the resentment against self. The riches are there, but not available until the relentless torture of self is over.  Laziness encompasses all to the point where I would like the best, but I’ll settle for the worst–because it is easy.

Sinking into nausea to escape the self absorption.  Anything to take my mind off of self. The creature that holds my thoughts captive is a reflection of self that materializes so I can embrace and accept what lies beneath the surface.

Morbidity eminent and welcomed at times to take me away from the gift of the present. Escaping the surrender that serenity has freely offered. Choosing death over life, repeatedly.

Succumbing to the lie. Evolving farther away from the truth. Trying to embrace reality on life’s terms instead of my own agenda.

Resonating from within, the sound I have been searching for has been there all along.

Experiencing Euphoria

Posted in Life, Present with tags , , , , , , , , , , on May 13, 2011 by Shea Atkin

Today has been one of the most monumental days of my life.

I woke up to the sound of my phone at 4:36 this morning, my client called me to say that she was in labor!  She has been a massage client of mine for years and I have worked on her through her entire pregnancy.  Today I was able to massage her through labor and delivery.  AMAZING.

Luckily, the little guy was born at 7:30 this morning and I didn’t have to cancel my clients today.  I’m exhausted, but on a natural high right now.

At 2:30 I went to meet with a therapist to collaborate in regards to my upcoming Trauma Touch Therapy™ workshop.  This will combine the somatic approach to physical and psychological effects due to Trauma.  We will be writing an article  for publication soon, so stay tuned!  My workshop is at the end of May, and I can’t tell you how incredibly excited I am to be able to implement this into my practice.

Going through my own personal trauma is the reason I am extremely passionate about this approach.  All of the hell that I went through, now completely makes sense and seems worth it.  I feel that God just created a specialty especially for me.  I know that sounds completely selfish, but I am amazed at the personal interest He takes in my life.  Everything that has happened has led up to me being able to be trusted with this opportunity.  I am  grateful and extremely humbled to be given such a special gift.

I know this blog is all over the place today, but I’m living off of espresso shots to get me through til my next client.  During this 30 minute break, I wanted to get it out there with the passion that I am feeling in this exact moment.  I don’t want to forget the euphoria that I feel right now with all of the life changing events that happened today.

I’m sure tonight I am going to crash like nobodies business, but right now I am on top of the world.  Living a life of purpose and passion is beyond explanation.  I’m so thankful that I get to participate this fully in life and recovery.

Rhetorical Domination

Posted in Life, Poetry, Present with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 20, 2011 by Shea Atkin

Slipping through the cracks of myself

Hiding behind words that I have conjugated to fit into the persona I have created

Fooling myself and everyone around me–but the joke is on me

Seeking solace in the unknown

A vast canopy surrounds my shattered soul

Depending on restoration–while the process is unbearable

A selfless cry sheepishly lunges out for comfort

Finding myself in the place I thought I could never arrive through all of my attempts

Spontaneous glimpse of healing from the unlikeliest of sources

Slamming the door on what has kept me isolated–

As that door slowly opens back up–a flood of compassion enters into this grieving spirit

Revitalizing what was once something special

It’s not even a restoration at this point–it’s a brand new life

Ready to live instead of preparing for death

Happy to be a part of what I once thought was being stuck in the middle

Reaching out for a hand to hold

All that is required is a willingness to know that I will never have all the answers

Will lay my head on the pillow tonight knowing that control will never bring me peace.

Recycled Vulnerability

Posted in Life, Past, Poetry, Present with tags , , , , , , , , on March 25, 2011 by Shea Atkin

 

Lying dormant for the right opportunity

Surfacing when emotionally available

 

Second thoughts materializing as the answer

Questioning logic while entertaining fantasy

Visceral reaction–sparked by letting go

 

Compromising trust with choice

Rarely saving reality a seat

 

Options infinitum

 

Nothing is new

All has been here before

 

Learning from the past

As I enjoy the present

I wait for the future

Which has already taken place